If there is one word that can create intense reactions of defensiveness, dismissal or shame in people, it is surely the word Victim. While I could point to the 'gifts' of being a victim from the Shadow work I do, that's not what today is about.
This post, is about recognizing how prevalent a victim perspective is in our world and where we are letting it make decisions for us.
While some people would resist with BIG drama being called a victim, I'm asking you to be willing to consider where you might have felt like a victim: someone takes the parking spot you have been waiting for; there is no toilet paper in the bathroom when you've already closed the door; the cashier goes to lunch when you are in a hurry; a co-worker jumps up and takes over something you really want to do; or the cell phone company won't resolve your complaint.
Besides feeling that people are victimizing us there are circumstances too; an accident holds up traffic during rush hour; a storm knocks out power so you have no internet access; it rains when you have to walk home; a sale ends the day before you find out about it; there's nothing on the menu that's on your healthy eating plan.
Whether we like it or not, most of us default to feeling victimized from time to time (and maybe more often than we even realize). A voice in our head says "why is this happening to me; why are people so rude; why can't I catch a break; what's wrong with me; what's wrong with the world; what am I being punished for; and ." And on and on.
And what happens when we feel victimized? We either retreat into shame or lash out at someone else. At least, that's what we do when we don't see ourselves as a Creator. In his intriguing little book called The Power of TED, David Emerald shares a compelling alternative to the Victim Perspective.
When we recognize where we default to feeling victimized we get to choose to stay in that perspective or move into a more empowered space as the Creator of our lives. My world shifted when I took a long, hard look at this unique concept. Stay tuned for Part Two.