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Legacies and Character

1/18/2017

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Fierce, focused and fair. When my dear friend and spiritual brother Ilan passed away last spring I immediately knew what his legacy for me would be. Ilan was fierce in his commitments; focused on what mattered to him; and fair in how he treated others.

At first it felt like a great little catch-phrase - the three F's of my friend. But I did a some journal writing and reflecting and I knew that among his other many gifts (humour, critical thinking, love of travel, etc.) these were the ones that had inspired me to grow our relationship.

It also got me thinking about legacies. Lots of people talk about how they would like to be remembered and yet, how we live our lives is what will be most cherished for by those we leave behind. Having spent so much of my life trying to unravel the angst of my upbringing and my lack of coping skills, I can only imagine how some of the many people who have known me will remember me. It feels uncomfortable to think that my decades of sifting through painful experiences and struggling to make sense of my life might have left an indelible and perhaps unflattering legacy.

And then again, there is my character; the way that I 'think, feel and behave'. Like Ilan, I can be fierce, focused and fair. Maybe that's what drew two highly unlikely pals together to form a bond of love and friendship that still feels alive in my heart. Like me, Ilan's character was also shaped by his extraordinary life and when the dust settled, we both have inspired people with our ability to rise above the weighty issues of our lives.

Whether we intend it or not, our character may well be the legacy that we leave to others. And those 'others' are not just the people closest to us but the ones we pass on the street, meet in community, connect to online and just give a warm smile to. Today, let your character be revealed to world. Someone is looking for hope and you might just be the one to deliver.

Ms. Daryl Wood is the founder and heartfelt leader of the life-enhancing Women's Wisdom Retreats. She is also a published author and an empathetic, compassionate, Outcome-focused Coach. She will be facilitating a special Women's Empowerment Retreat focused on the TED* work on March 25/26 2017 in Milton, Ontario. Visit www.darylwood.com and www.womenswisdomretreats.com for more information.

2 Comments
Gay
1/23/2017 07:12:32 pm

Thanks for a wonderful tribute to my husband and soul mate. So happy that his spirit shines on in the people who knew and loved him.

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Kathy
1/23/2017 07:53:05 pm

No truer words were ever spoken about this most amazing person. But also about the meaning and value of the legacy we are all capable of leaving. Thanks Daryl, for this heartfelt tribute to my friend.

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