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7/27/2013

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We set our goals and intentions. We plan and prepare. We visualize the result. We feel the energy and animation within us as we lean into the experiences of our lives.

And then a massive avalanche rushes down the side of the mountain and the outcome is forever changed. My friend Adrian has witnessed the power of snow crushing it's way down the valleys of K2 and carrying with it the end of his dream to summit this challenging peak. It is indeed the extreme version of what so many of us face every day: an unexpected, unwanted outcome.

Except for the times when the new outcome feels wonderfully better than we had hoped for, we can spiral into disappointment and frustration.
How many times have I read the words of the wise masters urging me not to be attached to the outcome? There is surprise and mystery in not knowing. And there is also surrender.

Surrender requires that we let go of things having to be the way we want them to be or the way we think they should be. Surrender means trusting that no matter what happens, no matter how things turn out, in the end, it's all good. I've often heard myself say to myself and those around me who are worrying or wondering "You know, in the end, everything always works out. I don't know how or why but it always does. Every single time."

But accepting that things will always be for our highest good demands that we trust and that we are willing to look for the 'good' in every circumstance. When we miss the bus and arrive late at an event, can we find the positive impact? When we plan a gathering that end up being cancelled, can we see the learning? When we expect something of someone who doesn't 'deliver' are we willing to believe this was what needed to happen for the benefit our growth?

Being attached to an outcome creates expectations and leaves no room for something bigger and better to emerge. Life is always offering us lessons. If we can let go of our attachment, we invite divine wisdom to be our teacher.


2 Comments
Crystal Bonsi
7/30/2013 04:53:20 am

Your comments about "urging me not to be attached to the outcome...There is surprise and mystery in not knowing. And there is also surrender." remind me about giving birth to my first child. I studied fetal psychology in university and thought I was very smart in planning the most natural birth possible to give my child the best start possible. I showed up at the hospital with 2 typed pages of everything I did not want them to do - no epidural, no episiotomy, no x, etc. At the end of the process which included 72 hours of labour including over 8 on an induction machine there were only a few items that did not occur. It did not go how I planned it but nevertheless today I still have a healthy, beautiful, and intelligent daughter. Advice I give mothers-to-be is to make a plan but don't be attached to it as what will be will be so just go with it. Suffice it to say with my second child I walked into the hospital and told them to give me the drugs :) .

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Daryl
7/30/2013 05:19:31 am

Oh Crystal - this is VERY familiar and a typical situation that many women can relate to. Being attached can cause so much anxiety. Love the ending!

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